Courageous Conversations
If I had a nickel for every time a client told me they were repeatedly frustrated with an employee, I’d have a whole lot of nickels.
Here’s what gets me. Most entrepreneurs and leaders got where they are, due in part to their high-level of courage. Yet, when it comes to having courageous, and even tough conversations with members of their team, they avoid it like the plague.
Sometimes it’s because they don’t want to be the bad guy.
Sometimes it’s because they’re afraid that they will lose that employee.
Sometimes they simply think it’s just not fixable and they have to live with it.
In most cases, they fail to see the damage it’s doing to their company, their team, and their reputation as a leader. Moreover, they fail to see how easy it can be to correct at times.
I’ve always believed that the best performers crave coaching and feedback. They may not always like to hear it, but they do crave the feedback if it helps them become better.
??After all, have you ever met a truly great performer who doesn’t want to get better??
I always encourage my clients to lean into these courageous conversations. Yes, it can be uncomfortable but with practice, it gets easier, it’s highly effective, and very liberating.
Now, I won’t ramble on about the hundreds of courageous conversations I’ve had throughout my career and what the results of each one were, but I will say this:
I’d estimate that about 60% of the time, having a corrective conversation with an employee resulted in a healthy level of improvement.
Roughly 20% of the time, there was little, if any improvement but the employee was valuable enough that I looked past it.
The remaining 20% of the time, there was no improvement and the employee either left or was terminated and we found someone better for the role. And yes, there was some level of short-term pain, but my team was happier and significantly better for it in the long run.
I’ll take those results any day of the week.
Here’s my approach:
Schedule a meeting with the employee to discuss the issue. Don’t just do it on the fly or send an e-mail.
When possible, have the meeting in your office face to face and pull your chair out from behind your desk so there is no barrier between you.
Use “marker statements” similar to this:
I value having you on the team.
You do so many things incredibly well in your role.
I see opportunity for you to become even more valuable here.
As your leader, it’s my responsibility to help you grow, and I am committed to doing so because you’re worth it.
An area where I need to see some immediate improvement is…
To be clear, my expectations are…
Can I count on you to make those adjustments?
Use this approach and you’ll see results.
Of course, you always have the option of doing nothing and just going into your office and banging your head against the wall like you do now.
Your call.